Season of Weakness

I’m easily affected with sadness.

It gets inside me like a fluid.

It enters my soul without my permission.

And it even stayed for awhile

I’m not sure what’s the reason

but I know exactly what it meant

that as of now I’m powerless

motivated, determined but real as af powerless

my mind is so strong my heart is getting weak

my hopes and dreams stated unclearly

my path blurred with all the lies

I hear, I see and I feel

I’m mad with weakness for being here

I’m unsatisfied with fate

maybe because I don’t believe

in being independent with no one

powerful realizing I’m weak inside and out

pride or not

needless of words

Just look into my eyes

and take a wander to my eagerness

this weakness is no place

as big as my aspirations be

This season must end

This season must end.

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Catalysts

 

As soon as I found myself jobless I decided to let myself admire games again. It started with Wizard 101– a portal to the very amusing Magical World next is the Contest of the Champions by MARVEL. The first entails Monsters and that’s the main reason why I’m interested in it. However, the latter uses also Monsters especially with the Science Champions such as The Hulk and from the other types they have The Groot and Drax which both are from the legend of the guardians. Way back before I’m already fond of Tekken and the like, a monthly visit to an arcade is a common thing every Rest day off work and it really amazes me how it shifts my mood to a good reasonable one.

Now back to my CATALYST topic, by definition Catalyst means: (c) Merriam-Webster

  1. 1:  a substance that enables a chemical reaction to proceed at a usually faster rate or under different conditions (as at a lower temperature) than otherwise possible

  2. 2:  an agent that provokes or speeds significant change or action

I take the latter. There’s no doubt about the fact that money makes the world go running around its orbit yet it depends on the individual, the human makeup, its experiences and uproots. Money as an agent is very critical when consumed or used lavishly. It doesn’t serve the purpose of intentionally not making the lives of everyone as easy as before. In today’s reality  Money seems to be the root of all evil and that even sounds legit to me. It madly changes the person’s views and actions towards being successful. It speeds up crime rates up and running all over the globe and certainly one of the main issues that surround us today.

It is quite unquestionable what Money does to men and benefits it gives to human lives. But the fact that is dangerous to the hands of the fools and falls to the unearthly ideas of the gamblers these will solely add  “Money” more of its negative side effects on us.

However, the utilization of Money isn’t just limited to the bad intentions of those hard headed fools. It seems to me that this agent of speeding up development in our lives reasonable is just an agent, a tool, to be used, wisely and with good purpose. We the people of the earth, not the aliens who are far away from us is deeply responsible on how it’s used.

A catalyst for the lives of the people who earns and save for their lifelong dreams, to be someday successful and satisfied with what their lives have to offer for them to sustain and evade poverty that makes us struggle we are dealing with even the basics of every day. To support and to continue our aspirations, even if it takes much longer time to attain them but with our perseverance and honesty, money can be our best friend in the future.

Nothing seems to be decreasing for everybody to purchase in terms of the material things. Our own nation’s economy strangles us with limited resources and unbelievable requirements before we can land an appropriate job for us because of this we are challenged to keep up with the so many changes in life particularly with the irregularities within our own governing bodies that even professional and legal advisers can’t handle up until now. “It’s an unavoidable battle” and change is badly and boldly needed.

A signifact yet important change with good intentions and with a heart. We can’t push people to their limits but we can be a catalyst for these hopeful changes. We don’t put the blame to our parents  so as to put blame to others because we can be a hero, our own life’s hero for the greater good, to be considered a model for the betterment of the future generation. God is good. We must put our faith in him but we must outdo our limits being bold, honest with our actions and keep our faith intact for a successful impact.

 

 

Some of us are interested, driven yet our actions are limited: ASTROHOPE for the better

via Daily Prompt: Better

 

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image (c) VictoriaDoodle

I remember way back before when I’m in my childhood days, I always hope and pray for a better tomorrow especially with the fact that I came from a broken family.

despite from the loneliness that I feel from time to time with events like my family members arguing about parenting, education, guidance and the like I always Papa God for his assistance and the prayer intentions for both of my troubled parents. Even with a young soul, I have before with the years gone by without their support from there I slowly grasp the truth and lies of my childhood, accepting them through my tears and keeping up with my peers just to be shifted.

truly angels are ever present in our world and I wanna thank them especially My grandparents for being more responsible than my own parents. Without them, I can never see myself to be professional and a responsible human being. Their ways and ideas might not be as modern as compared to anything else, but it was the best method I’ve experienced and I’m truly grateful for their existence and from then on I promised myself I’ll be a much better role model for the youngsters and the society itself.

I wanted my parents to be better in the future- that’s my idea before

but up until now, even though how much they wanted to be better for me and my siblings, with just their intentions and no plausible efforts sadly I think this idea is somewhat vague

We grow from our experiences and continue to be better.

Bus ride: First 5 day

Yes, I’m on my 5th day going back and forth to General Santos City for my IELTS review. Bus ride will took approximately an hour journey from my home city, Koronadal. At first it never occured to me that I’ll be this flexible adjusting to land trips, five days a week, summing it up to 10 rides all in all. In other words, I’m beginning to feel a little bit of boredom just by thinking about it. 

All of a sudden, I’m starting to practice the art of “never mind”, sleep and just relax, this won’t take this daily grind of mine. Today is Friday 3rd of March year 2017. It’s a not just like any other day I may say, this day is congruent to the word “rush”. I’m not gonna deny it, every time I hear  the terms “Friday’ and “Monday, the laziness inside me apparently kicks in.

Putting up alarm clocks on mobile phones, tabs and even human body clocks. Well they doesn’t work with me every time, the best discovery therein is the “snooze tool”, very manageable. *giggles Grateful for this helpful invention. Supposedly it will just be a back up feature whenever your desired time is a fail. Always.

I cannot elaborate enough but I’m well aware and used to it. In case you (readers) don’t know I’m a graduate of Medical Laboratory Science, a Scientist, working as a Medical technologist. I am constantly experiencing habitual things because of my chosen career, just to keep up with my laziness to wake up for classes and work. These things are never new to me. What makes me blog is the unfamiliarity of the unknown. This makes me had a Go-Go! attitude in life. This is what keeps me running and walking. The road to the future. The journey to my American Dream.

 

Victoria 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Taking a break before the wave

Hello there readers I’am Nicole and now I’m currently spending my 3weeks off after my maybe 6 months of reviewing for a professional exam for my career , right now I’m kinda into watching korean drama , a marathon, International movies, peeking into what’s the next step is goong to be and by not forgetting to keep a healthy lifestyle by spending 45 mins of walking and jogging every other day, especially in the morning.

I’m lessening eating carbs by just eating rice once a day or just every other day. Accompanied by meat , or meat plus bread, or Oats plus meat, they will do. 👌🏼

Also I’m back into drawings, like doing vectors and such, I’m updating my Victoria doodle fanpage on facebook Victoria Doodle . Please visit my page if you have your spare time. It’ll be my pleasure.

Okay back to the “wave“. The word for me means “my next step towards my American dream” reviewing and taking the exam , IELTS, International English Language Testing System. 

It has 4 parts:

  1. Listening
  2. Reading
  3. Writing and
  4. Speaking

I know I’am fond of english words taught by Music lyrics. It helped me a lot and I’m thankful for our Music Channels,the Web and to my Lolo or Grandfather for letting us, as a child he keeps giving us his grandchildren modules for english speaking, reading, listening and writing by providing us friendly stories and by insisting his english movies to be watched even once a week.

I know this break is good for me, I’am just truly grateful for the blessings of Papa God and by the love of my Family and Friends. Their support and advices. May God bless us all, always as we take our own paths towards success.

Victoria

This is a shout out to my “X”

it’s been a long time. My friend told me a while ago na “Iba talaga basta first love” i told her na “maybe”. Kasi hindi ko sure eh. Sabi panya “iba pa talaga if magkita kayo ulit”. Mmmmmm. Sa isip ko that will be pretty much awkward like hell.

I went to a Coffee shop to review my notes for my upcoming exam. I spent maybe 3-4 hours sitting and reading and taking down notes until someone very familiar passed by beside the Coffee shop. My heart and mind goes WTF! It took 20 minutes for me to calm down and come to my senses. A ghost from the past. Maybe I’ll call this a moment of finally slaying the past with that moment. Seeing that person again for how many years I know one day of my life, same town, familiar group of friends, what not to know?

After that encounter I told myself that I’m pretty darn blessed with the gift of acceptance and forgiveness. A variable “X” of the past, from that day there’s no question of Y do I even have to bother of your presence or absence . I made mistakes and so did you. I’ll never gonna deny the fact that I’ve been like many other teenagers who thought of love as a game and luck.

Falling in and out of love – is art. Full of wonders. And guts. God bless you always!

This is me, the person who’ll never gonna dwell in the past.

If I stumble again moving on. I guess it’s gonna be painful but I know withing myself with the help of and love of the people mattered today  and tomorrow, I’ll stand up and fight !